GOOD

Its Saturday, and I'm up early. I feel good today. I did well at the gym this week again and my spirit is lighter than is has been in a while. My body is a little lighter too.

I got flowers again this week from R. It didn't make me as sad as the last one did. I also didn't check my blocked numbers this week to see if he had tried to call. I had to consciously do it the first couple of days, but Thursday and Friday I just forgot to. 

It makes me feel a little pang of sad when I think about him and the relationship that I worked so hard on, and fought so hard for, is not just over but fading, but that also feels good. 

I'm starting to think about it as being in my past. I want to learn from it as I have learned from all past experiences. Ill leave the bad behind, and take the good. There was good though, and being away from it for almost 3 months now is making it easier day by day not to be angry anymore. 

I cant help but feel sorry for R if he really is doing what he keeps saying he's doing by holding out for "us", but part of what was broken with us is trust, and part of me thinks he's just doing these things and saying these things to get to me, but meanwhile he's out seeing other people and living his life, "just in case". I have to remind myself that that is what he did before, and even if he's not, it doesn't make any difference. Its over, and I am moving on. 

Its going to be a pretty, cool day, and I want to make the most of it. I will hike today and enjoy being outside. First though, I will make my mom a good breakfast because she looks forward to Saturday Breakfast. 

I will appreciate the good of today, and hope for another good one tomorrow.